Death of a Phone ..

Mama tells me I started talking at the age of nine months . And by the age of one I was Baby Bilingual . ( I did not deem it necessary to walk till I was two and a half – mother claims my preferences haven’t changed since )

At two I called a pregnant houseguest (who was complaining to mama about her ailments) a hypochondriac , and at three told some pretty girls in a market ( who were admiring a very happy papa’s cute daughter ) that ‘I’m not a doll I’m a Rupika’

Not surprising that every afternoon my bleary eyed grandmother , weary of my unending desire to communicate would tell me ‘pranana vangriye rajati ‘ and a lot of other things I don’t remember which basically meant " Princess ( if calling you that gets you to shut up You Brat!) Spare my life and Let me sleep …."
Things haven’t changed since . Yesterday my Newest Victim ( NV ) told me I had murdered their Phone…..
NV claimed that in its entire life , poor Phone had not received as many sms’s as it did in an hour of messaging me ( let it be known here that NV loves hyperbole ) .
I felt very guilty for a while –considered getting myself a pseudonym – Rupika the Phone Slayer /The Communicator ( sequel to the exterminator) …. and I was wondering how to make amends with poor Phone.
Till the Voice of Reason in my head finally spoke – NV was equally guilty !!
a. They could have charged Phone and THEN it would have lived!
b. They know that sensitive soul that I am if they had NOT replied I would have stopped messaging

Any one of my 22 readers would see a pattern here and know that it is hypotheses time now . Why did NV become a co - conspirator in killing Phone ( or why do I end up turning normal human beings into SMS Rock Stars )
1. Initially out of politeness ( Now that I have got a message it’s good manners to reply , right ? )
2. Followed by a strong competitive instinct( SHE cannot sms faster than ME )
3. Entertainment on the go ( Hmmm…this is marginally better than radio !) and Intellectual exercise ( How shall I reply to THAT now ? )
4. A closet belief in magic ( What if those damn Cartwheels actually work ?!)
5. Curiosity . ( Whatever next ? ) ….

…..( there was a gap of a full working day between the beginning of this post and what follows now so if you notice a dramatic drop in quality please attribute it to mental exhaustion )

Come to think of it , this IS the end of this post . Need to do more research on this subject . There must be more than my 5 Top of Mind Ideas ! Maybe will write myself a brief . Maybe will post the brief....

PP( Post Post ) : Henceforth , Phone above will be referred to as RV or Real Victim.
PPPPP: ( Post Post Post on Photograph in Post ) That's my parents in the photo , still smiling ( because I hadn't spoken yet )